The student news site of Oakton High School

Oakton Outlook

The student news site of Oakton High School

Oakton Outlook

The student news site of Oakton High School

Oakton Outlook

Taking the wrong road trip

Taking+the+wrong+road+trip

On August 4th 2014 I got the phone call that changed my summer. My Aunt Hattie had passed away unexpectedly that morning. Her death struck me hard and left me frozen in shock and the world seemed to stop turning. Most high school students have experience  the loss of a love one. The way everybody grieves is different and the most important thing to remember is that there is no wrong way.

Psychologists assert that grief is broken into five stages. These five parts are denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance. I can, without hesitation, say that I have not gone through this cycle. Yes I have experienced the stage of depression and acceptance with the loss of both my grandfather and Aunt Hattie but never the other three stages, and not in that order. Which is okay, grieving is not an illness that needs symptoms and diagnosis to be a real thing.

Dealing with grief is especially difficult. It is a maze that is nearly impossible to maneuver10601287_685652431523929_648323073_n that only unravels itself overtime. Fortunately, my family turned the death of my aunt into a southern road trip. The beginning  focused mainly on family, with visits to various parts of Mississippi, where my Gran and Aunt Hattie grew up and family lived.

It is important to find somebody to rely on during the grieving process. If it is a best friend, parent, family member, or teacher it is important never to grieve alone. That support can also be a way to offer a light in a dark situation. I am not able to visit a lot of my moms family. During this road trip, I made amends with my cousins in Tuscaloosa and got to know my cousin in Mississippi. The trip to Mississippi was the highlight because of how I was able to visit a long-standing family farm. My cousin David and his brother Colin run the family farm, which now solely harvest soy beans. I experienced one of the prettiest views in all of Mississippi. The thing I remembered during this experience is that the passing of a love one provided me with this wonderful opportunity.

Following David through the soy bean fields
Following David through the soy bean fields

Even though the loss of a loved one is hard, always look for hope. The guidance from the people who care for you and your own strength are what will take you to the other side. Grief is a horrible feeling but a lot of good can come out of it as well. It gives you the opportunity to become closer with your family. You also can continue the legacy of the person who has passed away by remembering what you liked most about them and try to act the same way towards other people. It is possible to find the good in grief.

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Taking the wrong road trip